News headlines that didn’t quite work out…

[mina]

News headlines that have actually been used in newspapers!

Crack found on Governor’s daughter
Something went wrong in jet crash
Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers
Iraqi head seeks arms
Prostitutes appeal to Pope
Panda mating fails; veterinarian takes over
Teacher strikes idle kids
Miners refuse to work after death
Juvenile court to try shooting defendant
War dims hope for peace
If strike isn’t settled quickly, it may last a while
Cold wave linked to temperatures
Couple slain; police suspect homicide
Red tape holds up new bridges
Typhoon rips through cemetery; hundreds dead
Man struck by lightning faces battery charge
New study of obesity looks for larger test group
Astronaut takes blame for gas in spacecraft
Kids make nutritious snacks
Chef throws his heart into helping feed needy
Local high school dropouts cut in half
Hospitals are sued by 7 foot doctors
Safety experts say school business passengers should be belted
Drunk gets nine months in violin case
British left waffles on Falkland Islands
Lung cancer in women mushrooms
President wins on Budget, but more lies ahead
Squad helps dog bite victim
Enraged cow injures farmer with axe
Plane too close to ground, crash probe told
Stolen painting found by tree
Two sisters reunited after 18 years at checkout counter
Killer sentenced to die for second time in 10 years
British union finds dwarfs in short supply
Residents can drop off trees
Prosecutor releases probe into Undersheriff
Old school pillars are replaced by alumni
Sex education delayed, teachers request training
Magistrate acts on lewd shows
Polices stoned at concert
One in three blow job interview

[gee4]

Geeez - who's the editor of these articles - the last one sure didn't get read!

G

[jane10]

Brilliant!  I love this sort of thing.

Thanks for the laugh on a rainy Friday!

[countrigal]

A few of these I was slow to catch, as I automatically put pauses in that made them make more sense.  I'm sure that's what happened with the writers and/or editors of these.  If you know what you're saying and meaning, then it makes sense.  But it does give a good laugh now.  Thanks for sharing!

(and now I want to re-check everything I've written in the past months to see if I made any of these types of errors)

CountriGal
Peer Moderator

[Katie G]

Owww - stomach hurts from laughing.....
I REALLY needed this today.  Thank you!