Question on being the go-between...

[dwreath]

I'm just looking to hear what others' thoughts are on a situation I'm in.  I'm not management, but the employees don't necesarily view me as one of them.   I am the one they  tell complaints/issues to and then I inform the boss/owner of the company.  The employees like it because then they don't have to face the boss, the boss likes it because its easier for him.  Typically, when I relay the info to the boss I keep it anonymus... as in I will say " I've had a complaint about an employee..."  

Well, I had to relay to the boss that there was a complaint yesterday about a co-worker.  He spoke with the worker, then she came to me wanting to know who complained.  I told her that is something I can't answer and left it at that.  My problem is she then preceeded to tell me how this just comes at a perfect time because she just got a job offer from somewhere else.

My problem... since most view me as the go-between... was she telling me this so i take it to the boss?  Typically I just relay problems and complaints.  You know, issues that need to be addressed.  This is different.  Other than just to vent, I'm not sure why she was telling me that.  

Any opinions on this matter?  I'm not sure if I am suppose to relay what she told me to the boss or not.  She literally is the only person in her department and there is no one here at this time that could even pitch in at this employees job if she does up and leave.

Thanks,

Debb

[Christine Itterly]

Debb,

Unfortunatly, I have no suggestions/ideas for you.  This is because you could have just been describing MY life.  Right down to the fact that there is an employee leaving and I don't know if I should go to the boss or not.  I think I was told in confidence, but he is also being a real jerk about it when he gives his notice.  I feel like I have an obligation to go to my boss, but I also feel I have an obligation to keep my mouth shut.  

I am very interested to see what others on the board have to say about you r situation.  As for me, I am keeping my mouth shut until Friday.  Either way, the owners are going to be p*ssed and feel hurt and betrayed and I will take the brunt of it.  At least I have a little forwarning.

Hope you get a solution to your issue.

Christine

[lioness]

In this instance, you shouldn't say anything to the boss. It's your co-worker's responsibility to give notice and let everyone know she is leaving. If you say something, there's a very real possibility she will be asked to leave on the spot, and this could cause a lot of trouble for you. Unfortunately, you and the others will have to pick up her slack, but that's the way it goes sometimes. In telling you, she was probably saying, "So what if someone complains about me. I'm going to be gone soon anyway." If she didn't ask you to tell, you shouldn't.

Lioness, Queen of the Jungle

[raindance]

I quite agree - you should definitely not tell your boss about your co-worker.  It is the duty of the person leaving to give in notice and it is their right.  It is also their right to change their minds if they so wish, so I advise you to stay away from this one.

I am a little concerned about your role as "go between" and I'm surprised that your boss encourages you to convey people's confidences to him.  A good boss doesn't hide behind his support staff.  He has an open door or at least a mechanism by which people can air their opinions and grievances.   I think that everyone who works at a senior level will be the recipient of many such confidences.  It often goes with the territory - people use you as a sounding board or just because they may be sure that it won't go further.  Very occasionally I may convey something to my boss that I think she needs to know, but that happens very rarely.  On the whole I listen, make soothing noises and helpful (or not) suggestions.  

My two bits.

Raindance

[strijdom]

Hi Debb,

I'm not sure that you shouldn't give your boss this piece of information. It does depend on what your role is as his assistant.

In my case for example, I have a coordinating role for a group of assistants. They bring their problems to me and I discuss them with my boss, unless the problem is personal of course. I agree that management should practice an open door policy but sometimes there are just too many employees to make time for personally.

That being said, I think it is important to also function as the ‘eyes and ears’ for your boss. Especially if he has many employees to deal with, your input can be very valuable in keeping him in touch with the work place. In the case in point: if this employee shared that information with you and didn’t specifically ask you to keep it confidential, then I would be inclined to mention it to your boss so that he can be prepared for the eventuality that he will need to fill the gap that this employee leaves.

By the way, she can’t just up and leave, can she? Doesn’t she need to give notice?

Stephen

[spitfire78]

My opinion on this is that she is hoping you will tell the boss about it.  I think she is trying to play the "oneupmanship" game.  In other words, she is hoping you will tell the boss that she has had another offer and because there is no one else who can pick up her job at the moment, he will feel she is indispensable and make her a counter offer.  Guess I can't blame her for trying.

As far as whether or not you should tell him about this... I agree with a previoius poster who is concerned about the position you are in.  I think there should be a set policy on how grievances/complaints are handled.  Your HR department should formulate a policy on this.  I think this situation puts you in an extremely awkward position.  Oh, for the most part it probably works out all right.  But right now you are in a sticky situation over this case, and this will certainly not be the last.  There should be a chain of command that should be followed for complaints.  The reason for this is to eliminate the he said/she said types of situation that can arise when things are handled so informally.

[JessW]

You should not have been put in this position in the first place, is my gut instinct.  But then I am reacting witht he benefit of hind-sight.

A similar situation happened to me, although I was getting complaints from the staff member in question, as well as him having dragged in a previous employee as well.  I was acting as go-between and it went to Employment Tribunal.  I nearly got professionally compromised over the whole situation.

I would recommend that you keep your own personal notes on this matter (and any others that may crop up, god forbid), then if as and when it becomes a serious problem (and not just of complaints made and accusations) then you can brief your boss on the history.

Ask yourself what could he do that would not put him over a barrel.  If necessary let him know you have a 'log' of such occasions and where to find it should he be interested / need to know.  This will cover your back, put the onus back on your boss and hopefully inspire your HR department to pull their finger out and create some sort of policy to cover this sort of eventuality.

Jess (can you guess I've been 'playing' office politics for far too long - over 25 years -  to get sucked into anything really serious?)

[msmarieh]

Actually, I have often acted as a go between for my boss and co-workers. I will ask people straight out if necessary, would you like me to bring this up confidentially with my boss or make an appointment for you to speak to bossie?

They can tell me know straight out and I will honor their wishes. Sometimes they were just venting.

As for this particular individual, I would probably have asked at the time, really, so when will you be giving your notice? That would let her know immediately that I didn't plan to do it on her behalf.

Marie

[dwreath]

Well... I didn't say anything to the boss.  I actually had two days of vacation and the boss is off all this week so we havn't even seen each other.

As for this employee, Besides just being a complainer lately, I  do believe she is vying for more money anyway now that I think about it.  

Also... as for chain of command... Its me.... but unofficially.  I work for a somewhat small company... about 25 employees.  There is my boss, who is the owner, and then there's me.  My official title is Administrative Assistant.  But I do mostly Office manager tasks.  I am HR, IT, accounting and basically keep everything running here at the office.  My boss is a bit of a chauvenist where as he doesn't believe women should be management so my role isn't officially a manager but he has told me that I am to be his eyes and ears for the office.  He wants me to relay stuff to him.   It was just this one instance that I wasn't quite sure how to handle.

As one person commented, I should have thought to ask the employee in question just for verification as to why she was telling me this.

Thanks for all the feedback so far.   Its definately interesting to see all the different views.

D.