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radaro
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« on: May 21, 2003, 08:00:57 pm » |
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The thread on peeves made me think of this thread. If you could wish for anything, no matter how outrageous or unrealistic, what would you wish for to make your job easier?
I would like to have one of those homing microchips planted in my boss's ear (like the vets do for beloved pets). Then whenever someone stops by my desk (about 50 times a day) and asks "Where's bossie?" I can just check the radar screen and say, "Oh, he's in the CEO's office" or "He's in the washroom right now".
Sorry folks, once he leaves his office, I don't always know where he is, nor do I want to.
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blufire21
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« Reply #1 on: May 21, 2003, 08:14:25 pm » |
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Oh, OH! When they start making them, I want 6. 3 for people here at the office, 2 for my parents and 1 for DH. I can never find them when I need them. As for me, I want a personal time machine. One that will speed up or slow down the day to allow my more time when I need it and less time when I'm borde.
Ellen (Oh yea, and a money tree also) in TX
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bethalize
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« Reply #2 on: May 21, 2003, 10:48:38 pm » |
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I like both those ideas.
You know those bits of software that you can use to keep track of all your documents and e-mails and so on, but they do it by subject - so anything with "Mr. Brown" in a folder or in the document or in the file name will be listed under "Mr. Brown"?
Well, I want something like that only to cover conversations as well. It will integrate what my boss thinks, says, does and e-mails and provide me with a complete record when searching. Then I can say "You didn't ask me to book you a flight, you only thought it".
And if it makes coffee as well, so much the better.
Bethalize
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deedee
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« Reply #3 on: May 22, 2003, 12:21:59 pm » |
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I want a cubicle noise eliminator! Maybe with a "mute" button, so I can quiet my co-workers' constant discussions of their weekend, vacation plans, golf games, and political opinions. It would also take care of those pesky cubicle noises, like rude people who clip their nails at their desk (yes! hard to believe, but they do!), slurp their coffee, listen to voicemail on the speakerphone (I can't tell if they're completely insensitive or just too ignorant to know how annoying it is), and play call-in radio talk shows at high volume.
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bethanial
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« Reply #4 on: May 22, 2003, 02:58:33 pm » |
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me too, me too -- on the chip implanted into bossie. I keep threatening to get him a big cowbell to hang around his neck. (You know, like the old Tom and Jerry cartoons -- so the mice always know where the cat is.)
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hooper
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« Reply #5 on: May 22, 2003, 03:00:15 pm » |
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I too like Bethalize, wish I had an electronic mind reading device, so that I could hear all of the things that my boss thinks he told me, when instead he only just thought about telling me. If that makes any sense? Joanna (seriously, if you'd told me I would of done it) Admin. Edited by hooper on 22/05/03 03:01 PM. |
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blufire21
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« Reply #6 on: May 22, 2003, 03:06:57 pm » |
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Yup, sho do. I would like that room that was supposed to block their conversations so no one could hear them that they had on Maxwell Smart You know, the one that didn't work right and we could hear them but they couldn't hear eachother. I want that exactly how it works, not how it's supposed to work. I need the silence.
Ellen (What? Can't hear you) in TX
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dettu
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« Reply #7 on: May 22, 2003, 04:16:35 pm » |
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Yes! Yes! Cubicle noise eliminator! I would also like a button on my keyboard that, when I press it, beams the person in front of my cube to somewhere else--say the middle of the parking lot, the controller's office, somewhere. Not only do they all have conversations for hours in front of my cube, frequently they try to talk to me about non-work issues when I am BUSY.
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hooper
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« Reply #8 on: May 22, 2003, 04:53:47 pm » |
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My boss is super messy, so I would also like (aside from the mind reading device) an "IRRELEVANT PAPER RAY" that I could point at his over burdened desk and blast away with, but it would only eliminate papers that he will never have any use for, this being the valuable feature, as I yearn to clean up his desk, but live in fear of throwing something "needed" away (god only knows which is which, as he has been known to write important information on used napkins).
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Christine Itterly
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« Reply #9 on: May 22, 2003, 05:07:17 pm » |
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When you find that all important "IRRELEVANT PAPER RAY" please, oh please let me know. I could use at least a dozen here. One for each person, and a backup just in case. Could we also program it to work on the irrelevant thoughts that seem to go through there minds while trying to dictate information as well. There is nothing worse than getting information for a contract, and having them stop every 30 seconds to ponder what they actually want on the contract. "This, no stop, that, well no maybe it should be this". Sometimes I want to say "I tell ya what, go figure out what you want on the contract and get back with me"
And as far as I'm concerned, little itty bitty pieces of paper, napkins, receipts, food bags, etc. etc. should be banned from bossies office permanantly. I'm sorry, but trash is trash, period. If it's important, don't write it on trash.
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spitfire78
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I want a machine that would reprogram bosses to actually THINK AHEAD. It would, of course, have to completely reprogram them, since we all know that bosses all have only one gear - PROCRASTINATION. What I wouldn't give to have a boss give me something and say "This isn't due for 3 weeks. I wanted to get it to you so you would have plenty of time to work on it, think about what you are doing, proofread it, and know that it is accurate before you send it out."
Ahhhh, I'd think I was in heaven...
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catsmeat
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How about something that causes mild (but persistent) irritation of some kind when they ignore deadlines? In one job, a team of managers had to submit a monthly report to my boss who summarised into a report for his boss. Reports due to my boss by 3rd working day of the month - theoretically. Around the tenth working day, bossie would run in panicking that no-one had submitted their reports and he was in trouble with his boss. I'd done my best - spoken to them all, sent them "memory jogging" e-mails, but all to no avail. Result: four disgruntled managers all vying to dictate their reports (usually leaving it until ten to five before they started work, but expecting me to do stuff that night all the same).
So .... set date in gizmo for deadline. Once deadline is passed, the culprit gets the treatment .... Perhaps gizmo needs an "intensity" dial for repeat offenders?
Catsmeat (wondering where she got the masochistic streak from)
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mnaeempk
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I would wish for a fan-like device which could blow piles of papers (meant for filing) to their respective files, automatically and accurately.  mnaeempk Naeem in Pakistan |
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countrigal
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That would at least let me know if that IS bossie coming down the hallway, letting me know it's safe to place the caller on hold since he'll be back in just a couple of moments. And it would negate my current habit of jumping up, checking all of the offices in our part of the hallway (all our service, and bossie could be in any one of them) just to find out if he's still around when that important call that he just has to have finally comes through. Train all my co-workers to send him back to his office if he starts beeping. That could be handy.... {{drifting off to dreamland....}}
CountriGal
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