Message #67767

[raindance]

Setting boundaries isn't easy when someone has already stepped out of line.  I think this person is possibly lonely and/or doesn't know how to behave at work.  If your company has a "drop by" culture, that's different.   Gee's advice is very good.  There are a few issues to consider around this problem - I've been in that place myself.

So here's what I would do:

1. Recognise who this lady is: your boss's boss's assistant, so she has the ear of someone senior to your boss.  I don't know whether this boss is The Big Boss, but I currently am Assistant to the Big Boss.  So, being the big boss's assistant gives you quite some power.  Everyone pays attention because of the role you fill. However, occupying that role places upon you, equally, some obligations.  She gets out of school early, so to speak, because her boss has a certain status and she has probably fixed that up with him for whatever reason.

You need a strategy to deal with her.

2. Next time she approaches you inappropriately or at an inconvenient time, say something like "Samantha (sorry, any Samanthas out there!), would you do me a favour please?" That will get her attention and she is unlikely to say no.  Then you say, "I wonder if you would be kind enough to .... send me an email if you have a request or need some information (whatever she's on about).  We are both very busy and I don't want you to waste your time coming to find me or call me as I often have to step away from my desk.  I don't really appreciate you seeking me out when I'm on one of my precious breaks."  You've been polite, haven't offended her, and asked her to comply with your requests.  Making your request into a "favour" is a fabulous way of getting what you want/need; if someone says "no" to your "favour", they look pretty mean.
3. Have lunch with this lady, even if you don't have time MAKE time.  Or at least have coffee and a muffin or a cookie on one of your breaks.  That's when you get to know her a bit more and what buttons to press in her psyche.  You can also use that opportunity to introduce, casually, into the conversation how much you value colleagues who are positive and how destructive it can be when someone complains all the time.

Trust me - she'll get the message loud and clear.  May take a bit of time for the ideas to percolate into her thick head, but they will.