Rudeness to Receptionists

[deskangel]

Hi, I have an issue that I'd like to bounce off of you all and see if anyone has any helpful tips to get me through the day.

I'm currently a receptionist for a high-volume office tower that gets visitors from ALL walks of life, and my primary function is security - checking IDs, printing visitor passes. I also answer plenty of information requests and work on projects occasionally.

It seems to me that in the 18 months I've been here, people have gotten meaner, or more ignorant, or perhaps I've just become less naive. Every day I put up with people talking on their cell phones while I'm trying to check them in, people carrying on loud conversations with each other while I'm speaking to them, even when I'm answering a question they've asked me, strangers interrupting EACH OTHER while I'm trying to check one of them in, and sometimes overt rudeness like the woman who said to me this morning "If it's so easy, why don't you just call them for me?" (Visitors are required to make phone calls themselves to the people/companies they're visiting in order to gain access.) Several times I have had people, grown adults, mind you, stick their tongues out at me while I am taking their photo for their visitor pass. Many people cannot answer a simple question such as "What is your last name" because they just don't have the listening skills. Could there be a reason why people do not take me seriously and treat me like I am less than human?

I'm a very sweet, helpful person behind the desk and it boggles my mind that people are SO RUDE. I have to wonder if they treat everyone like this??? I have pretty thick skin, but if I was working in a coffee shop I'd put a laxative in their drink if they treated me like this. Of course I'm more professional than that, so I just continue to smile and nod as though they've done nothing rude or stupid.   I've already asked my manager about transferring me to another position, since obviously this is not a lifelong career for me,  but... until then:

Does anyone have any tips for an in-person receptionist on dealing with the general public? Most specifically when they are on their cell phones and I need them to be off the phone in order to properly check them in? Or any other tips for dealing with rude people would be helpful, thanks!

[gee4]

Hi,

When visitors enter my company's premises they are greeted by 2 security guys.  We only have a receptionist assist them in the mornings until about 10/11am.  All visitors are asked to turn off their mobile phones and in some cases they must surrender these if they are camera phones.  We are not allowed camera phones on site and that goes for our employees also.

Because of the nature of our business, we are extremely security conscious so we must follow our company policy on "Ways of Working".

Here are a few tips...

- try being a little more assertive to gain visitor's attention
- raise your voice a little
- use the following phrases
  - If I could just have your attention for a few minutes...
  - I need to explain/go through a few things...
  - I need to remind you that...
  - Sir would you mind turning off your mobile phone for a second while I go through security with you...
  - Madam I have some routine questions to ask before we issue your security pass...

After all think about yourself and the places you call or visit.  We all go through security questions every day in order to speak to the bank about our finances or a department store to place an order.

Sometimes women in general are more likely to be ignored depending on the set up - speak up, be assertive.  Our security guys wear a uniform, all visitors report to them on entering and leaving our site.  Visitors are collected by their meeting host after they have gone through security and been issued with a security pass.

Do you have signs on your reception desk?  Might be an idea to think of some main points, print and laminate them and display where visitors can view.  Do you have a health and safety leaflet you hand out?  Many companies are obliged to hand these out and ask each visitor to read it for their own safety.

There are many ways of distracting visitors to ensure they go through all the necessary security checks.  They may not like it but it's how most companies operate these days.

[deskangel]

Thanks for your suggestions!

I really love the idea about posting signs, but I've thought of it before and the management will not allow this - even if they are very nice signs. :/

But your thoughts on being assertive and having certain scripts to say are very helpful. I do believe you're correct about my being female is a cause for the lask of respect. When one of my male supervisors are with me behind the desk, I have very few problems, but when it's just me and the other female desk worker, ugh...

Our security doesn't seem as tight as yours, as visitors are welcome to bring in phones, cameras, etc. Since our tenants are all sorts of different companies, some of them even have their own separate security procedures once the visitors reach their suite.

One of the major problems I have is when people talk loudly on their cell phones right in front the desk, even when they are not in the process of being checked in. This prevents me from being able to check in other visitors or focus on whatever part of checking in someone I'm doing, and visitors cannot hear my voice or understand my directions. There is an area just to my left that people are welcome to use to work/chat on cell phones, but sometimes they insist on doing it right in front of me!

Yesterday I had to (politely, but increasingly loudly) ask a young woman who was on the phone right in front of me at my desk, facing me, making dinner reservations, to please move away from my desk to that area. She came back later and told me that it was "not good for me to speak to people while they are on the phone." When I told her she should not have been on the phone right there, she immediately wanted to speak to my supervisor and asked for my name! I directed her to my management, and she spoke to my security supervisor (he laughed it off).

I know I should not have retorted the way I did, but her standing and talking there does, in my view, pose a security threat, especially since the tenant she was trying to visit had not given her authorization to check in.

Any help would be appreciated for these types of situations from anyone else, thanks!

[traudi]

Do you wear some kind of uniform?
Sometimes a uniform may make the difference. When I worked as a Sunday receptionist some people did not recognize me after work without my uniform. And I noticed that while wearing my blue suit people acted more business like towards me.

Traudi from Germany

[deskangel]

We do wear uniforms - they are very nice, expensive red sweater jackets with black trim, and we must have black dress pants or skirt on the bottom as well as black shoes. We have some pretty strict appearance rules, too, about hair, makeup, and jewelry.

We get a lot of comments about how nice the uniforms are, but usually from older people as the style is from at least a decade or two back!

[gee4]

Good point Trudi - a business suit might give a slightly different impression.

As for the rude lady on the phone, put up a sign that says, PLEASE KEEP NOISE TO A MINIMUM WHIILE VISITORS ARE BEING CHECKED IN.

That message should be clear to everyone, not just visitors, but employees as well.  It's all about equality.  Some visitors think they are special and should be treated differently.  Usually they are the ones who matter less.

[deskangel]

gee4,

I would love to post signs, but the management won't allow it. They have very clear ideas about what the front desk should look like, and having signs telling people how to behave is not part of their vision. This is Class A office space and they expect guests to know how to behave professionally, however, many professionals do not!

[traudi]

Maybe they will allow a sign like "In order to maintain discretion, please wait here" with two big gold posts and a thick red rope (like in a museum)?
It may annoy other customers if a third party can listen to everything they say.

[gee4]

If visitors are going to be that rude, do as I have done on occasions....stop speaking until they are ready to listen.  After all, if they are on their mobile, they are only wasting their own time by holding up the checking in process and delaying the start of their meeting.

[Katie G]

Hi Deskangel!

You've gotten a lot of good suggestions here, but I'm going to add one more little thing.  Try pitching your voice just a little lower.  Not louder, lower. 

My normal speaking voice, with friends and family, tends to be a bit on the high side.  In the office, I've "trained" myself to lower the pitch of my voice -- not so much that I'm trying to sound male, but enough so that the deeper pitch resonates a little more. 

Try lowering your chin a bit, keeping your throat open and speaking from your chest.  You're not trying to sound like a man, but lowering your pitch may add just enough "oomph" to your words that it just might make a difference.

I also agree with Gee, that if they're THAT rude, just stop until they're ready to give you their attention.  No use wasting your breath.  And after all, you wouldn't want to interrupt what is obviously an earth-shakingly important conversation.  (OK, that last was just a little sarcastic - sorry!)