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radaro
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« on: October 05, 2001, 11:54:44 am » |
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There is a possibility that my boss and I will be transfered to a new team. This team is comprised almost entirely of men (okay, there will only be one other woman on the team but she is based in Europe).
Being a high tech company, these guys are young. Some are married and even less have kids. I am married with kids. My boss (also a young, single guy) is very understanding of my family obligations. As long as he supports me I don't care what the rest of the team thinks about these obligations.
Now, this may be showing off my insecurities but, I'm kinda nervous about being on an all guys team. First of all, I'm afraid that I'll be treated differently. Secondly, of the people I know on the team, they get together after hours to socialize. This means either golf (which I have only played once and hate) or drinking (I don't do that). This type of socializing also extends to when they entertain clients (although probably not as much drinking).
By the way, if the switch goes through, I will be moving into a different position.
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workerbee
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« Reply #1 on: October 06, 2001, 12:20:42 am » |
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Will you have the same job as the guys? If you do, you'll need to prove yourself (time after time after time), and you'll be expected to socialize with them at least some of the time.
If you're going to be administrative support, you will really be able to carve out your own niche. As a slightly older, married woman with kids, you will be different from almost all of them, but if your job is different than theirs, what difference will it make? As long as everyone treats everyone else with respect, it should be OK.
This could work out to your advantage...
Best of luck; hope you love your new situation!
Elaine
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countrigal
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« Reply #2 on: October 06, 2001, 12:53:01 am » |
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Depending on the job, how you'll interact will be different. But it wouldn't be amiss if you could meet them once in a while for drinks after work. Nobody says you have to drink alcohol, a soda works just as well, and maybe your hubby could join you now and then if it's socializing so you get some time out with hubby too. Don't know what else to tell you except hang in there and see what develops.
As for being the only female, that's not always a problem. Don't worry about how they'll treat you - just demand respect if it's not given. We all know how to do this without verbalizing it rudely, so you'll be fine. Sometimes being the only woman has it's advantages in that they'll look at you as something of a mother-figure and give you the respect that position would get. They're not as demanding then either. Look at it as a chance to grow and develop more, and to train young men on how to be good bosses that we won't be calling hydras and sending Zena the Office Goddess to slay.
Good luck, and congratulations!
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goldenearring
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« Reply #3 on: October 05, 2001, 01:38:05 pm » |
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I'm with "The Bee" on this one. I've worked with all women before and, unfortunately, it is far better to work with all men, nine times out of ten. I'd be thrilled.
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execsec
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« Reply #4 on: October 05, 2001, 02:14:31 pm » |
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I'm with GE on this one. I MUCH rather work with men than women, any day. I've done both, and working with men is much easier.
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goldenearring
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« Reply #5 on: October 05, 2001, 02:52:07 pm » |
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And, we both know why, now, don't we, execsec?! LOL (So, just how does one make a cat's "rare rrrrrrrrr rare" noise on the computer?!) Haven't I worked a minute longer than you today? "rare rrrrrrrr rare" ROFLMB(uns)O
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goldenearring
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« Reply #6 on: October 05, 2001, 02:57:41 pm » |
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Lord, Countrigal, you make me cry, girl. Used to be that I'd have been looked upon as the "Christina Aguilera" of the group, but now I have to own up to the fact that I, too, could potentially be looked up to as the "mother-figure" of the group. I'd rather eat rocks!!!! For crying out loud, they've got their own mother. Let them go bug them, and leave me alone to get the work done.
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countrigal
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« Reply #7 on: October 05, 2001, 03:19:36 pm » |
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GE... we both know that though boys grow older, they never grow up. So no matter our age, we're always seen as mother figures.
Shall I hand you a hankie, now that I made you cry? Am I in a wired mood today, or what?!
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radaro
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« Reply #8 on: October 09, 2001, 09:00:40 am » |
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Okay, I definitely do not want to be a mother-figure!!
1. I have two sons and a husband at home so I am already a mother figure there.
2. Most of these guys are my age or only slightly younger so I don't want to be their mother figure (how depressing).
I guess I just want to be "one of the boys" without having to do the boy stuff. I'll just avoid the golf course, for the most part, and drink one drink then soft drinks from then on. And I do watch hockey but not to the same degree they do, so I won't look completely stupid when that conversation comes up. Maybe I'll be a civilizing influence on them (a girl can dream can't she?)
Actually, I used to work in a small office and it was just us four women. I liked it a lot because we could talk about everything from our kids to our "moon cycles" without worrying about offending anyone. I guess it was one of those rare occassions where we all got along, no one was a queen-bee or #itch and we had a really great time.
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countrigal
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« Reply #9 on: October 09, 2001, 09:02:36 am » |
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Radar, you way of handling it sounds like it will be perfect. I wouldn't worry, really... I'm sure you'll do fine and will fit right in with their boys' network.
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radaro
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« Reply #10 on: October 09, 2001, 09:05:08 am » |
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Thanks for your support. I am an Olympic Gold Medalist in the 100m Worrying Event. I always seem to worry about things, valid or not. I'm sure it will be fine, I just need to worry in advance.
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