Lack of Respect

[yankeestarbuck]

Well, I knew it would come back to bite my butt.  In another topic, a fellow admin was complaining about a person who could have done something for his/herself without bothering her and I (stupid) rationalized that it would be my job to do it, if he/she asked.  Well, here's the latest in the "I should keep my fat trap shut" arena.



Last week, while bad weather and illness made me very annoyed, I had a visit from the president of my company.  I work on a project for a subconsultant. The two major companies in the joint venture are large, but my company, a third, is smaller, which is nice because our president will visit the new employees in the various cities we all work in.  She's usually in CA, I'm in NY.  Well, all the various coworkers for this one employer all gather for these semi-annual meetings.  We were sitting in the conference room, discussing this project and others our company supports, with the door closed.  For all intents and purposes, we were "in a meeting."  A knock on the door.  One member of the Project Controls department HAS to interrupt to get a contract agreement signed.  He couldn't wait until we were done.  OK, that aside, contracts ARE important, we return to our meeting.  THEN, a manager knocks then just opens the door, looking for me....TO MAKE COPIES!  Oh, please, take me out of a meeting with my president to make copies for you.  Mind you, I smiled and did it, but how rude is that?  I didn't say anything, because what can you say after that?  My president was as polite as ever and understood "work must go on." But this wasn't critical.



I'm right to be miffed, yes?  Although I can't say anything, with all the time passed, I wouldn't have been out of line to tell her to leave it for me until I'm out of my meeting, yes?  I galls me to think that administration can't have it's own department and it's own meeting, aparently.  A complete lack of respect.  Thanks for letting me vent!

[Katie G]

Asking you to do something while you're sitting at your desk in the normal course of your day is one thing.  INTERRUPTING a CLOSED DOOR MEETING with your SUPERVISOR is something else entirely.  You're right though, there's nothing you can say without making yourself look bad (whiny, uncooperative, etc., etc.).  



If there's anything to be said, it should probably come from your supervisor.  (And if I were that supervisor, I'd have let them know that you would be available to help them AFTER the meeting.  But that's just me.)  But since nothing like that was said when it happened, it will probably slide.  



No real help here, but yes, you definitely have a right to be miffed in this situation.  Offices are full of spoiled brats who think theirs is the only work that needs to be done.  These are the folks I describe as needing a "nanny" instead of an "assistant".  Oh, well, look at it this way.  The fact that you didn't bat an eye and were able to return to the meeting without missing a beat just showed YOUR professionalism at its best.

[ccolleen413]

One of the reasons I lurk here is to learn from all the great wise ones.  But this case has me baffled.  Why couldn't you have just said something like "Thank you for bringing this straight to my attention.  I'm sure it must be a very big priority.  I will see to it that you get x# of copies just as soon as my meeting with Mr. Bigwig is over.  Do you want those 3-hole punched or stapled?"

 

[lioness70]

I was the one who vented about people like that.  Don't these people who need their "urgent" copies know you're meeting with the company president?



Well, the president probably made the comment she did because she knew the person was totally out of line-but YOU were the one who handled it professionally.



If it was me, though, I would have said, "Leave them on my desk and I'll make then for you as soon as I'm finished."  I'm one of those who won't let others dictate my priorities.



Last week, my coworker had to leave early, and she supports a very "needy" engineer.  I knew what was going to happen-if I let her, she was going to push her work on me.  I let this needy woman know right off the bat-politely-that I had work that would keep me buy until the end of the day.  She left me alone.  You have to be very assertive with these types, or you'll always be stuck as their babysitter.  Not fun.

[workerbee]

Yes, Yankee, you should be miffed.  However, your company president not only noticed how well YOU handled the situation, she noticed the MANAGER interrupt your meeting for something that could very well have waited until you and she were finished.  Don't underestimate your prez; she probably filed that information away for later.



Good for you for showing your professionalism!



Elaine

[countrigal]

I agree that you should feel miffed but that you did handle it very professionally and the Prez got to see you at your best (and the other person at their worst!).  But I think I would have handled it a little different.  I would have probably thanked them as I took the originals to be copied and then told them when they could expect the copies to be on their desk (after the meeting, when I had time to copy them).  That way you get to stay for the meeting but you are still professional in handling the copying that evidently was "priority #1" for someone else.  But, sitting here and not in your seat, it's always easy to say "I would've done "x"".



Vent, then smile that Professional Admin smile and continue doing your excellent job.

[kitchenwitch]

Yankee, you are a modicum of restraint and decorum.  I probably would have told the interrupter to go pee on a power line.  Just sending my admiration - you handled it wonderfully and I'm certain your pres. took notice of your incredibly professional behavior!

  Trish

[bethalize]

Kitchenwitch, that is TOO funny!

*slinks off chuckling to herself*

[energizer]

Trish, you crack me up!



Yank, I certainly empathize with you on this one.  Many's the time I've been interrupted to do some mundane thing while I was in the middle of something really important.  Usually I just put on my best professional smile, take the papers to be copied (or whatever!), and go do it.  But if I were in a closed door meeting, I believe I'd have taken the papers, put them very deliberately on the table in front of me, and said "I'll get them to you just as soon as I'm finished here."  I'd then turn around and face my boss (or whoever I was meeting with) and resume the conversation, effectively "dismissing" Mr. Rude.



One additional idea just came to mind -- maybe we (I'm including myself in this for future reference!!) could express dismay at learning that Mr. Rude is "copier-challenged."  (i.e., can't figure out how to push the START button on the copier!!!!  ) Just a thought!!



Hang in there, Yank.  Some day we'll be the whip-crackers and show these guys how it's really done!



Energizer

[goldenearring]

Yankeestarbuck - Somebody may have already said what I'm going to say.  I haven't taken the time to read the other advice above before posting mine, but I would have stepped out in the hallway with that person and quietly told them that although I can appreciate their need for my assistance, I don't appreciate being pulled out of a meeting for something that does not appear to be critical mission stuff.  I would then tell her that, if it is that urgent that copies be made right now, I suggest that she either make them herself or ask someone else.  Otherwise, I'd say, "I'll be more than happy to help you when my meeting is finished."  (Just got to be sure not to forget to follow through and ask if help is still needed!)  Then I'd turn on my heels and go right back in to the meeting, without missing a beat.  



Sometimes we have to practice these "big girl" techniques out loud in the mirror and in the car before we get the guts to say them out loud to a real, live person but, when we don't, we advertise ourselves as red carpets ready to be walked all over.  Don't get mad; get practicin'!  You can do it.  Just pay *careful*, careful attention to voice tone and body language, or you will come across as aggressive rather than assertive.  The person probably has realized their office faux pas by now, even though you likely will never hear an apology for the copies blunder.  

[fullmoongoddess]

I'd be tempted to type up instructions on how to work the copier, then, make this 'rude person' a copy and hand it to them saying, "Just in case you need this the next time I'm in a closed door meeting with my supervisor", AND SMILE while being very courteous during this transaction.  hehe





Dawn