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February 2004
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Features
Are you a natural born leader?
What do you mean, you've lost the laptop?
Meet me in cyber space.
Who's in the chair?
Clause for concern?
If only they would...
In the News
Friends are what we need indeed
A real reason to go to the gym
Burning bridges might not be so bad
Spelling is still important
Will the last person to leave please turn out the lights?
Event Calendar
Business Travel Show
Confex
Serial
Desk-bound Diaries
Kerry is really missing her mate, Janie, who has set out to explore the world. The lovely letter (complete with sand in the envelope!) and photos of her laughing on the beach just make her seem even further away. Should Kerry finish her weekly report, or pen a quick reply to her travelling work buddy? Hmmm... Tough call. She grabs a notepad...
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Who's in the chair?
Well, you are! But as chair, how well do you run your meetings? Do you keep fiercely to time, reach a satisfactory decision, and make sure even Timid Tony had his say? Or does the team emerge exhausted from a five-hour marathon, dominated by Pontificating Pamela, with no resolution in sight? Try our fun quiz, to see how sharp your chairing skills are...
The agenda is your friend. May not always seem like it - it looks pretty dull when you're typing it up. But work with your agenda and you'll find it's a key to keeping on track. When should you circulate the agenda?
It's fine to hand it out at the meeting, because people always forget to bring it with them
At least one week before the meeting. It gives people a chance to prepare their contribution, and helps reduce 'first quarter drag', where people try to work out what they're there for
Who needs an agenda? It's my meeting. I'll tell them what to discuss

It's hard to settle into your meetings, because there's a constant stream of people leaving the room to fetch paperwork and files they'd either forgotten, or didn't realise they needed. What can you do?
Well, it's better that they go and get their files, because it won't be a productive meeting without the information
At the bottom of your early-circulated agenda, add a paragraph which explains what you're aiming to get agreed in the meeting. Remind participants to bring with them all the information they need to make that happen
Introduce a new rule that anyone wanting to leave the room after the meeting has begun has to stand on their chair and sing the national anthem before they're allowed out

You know you'll have Droning Donald at your next meeting. Everyone dreads it when he begins to talk, because he just goes on, and on, and on. How do you stop him?
Oh, just let him talk. It doesn't really matter. He's usually got one or two valid points. Usually...
To start with, put timings on the agenda next to each item, and mention in your opening welcome that you'll be watching the clock like a hawk. If Donald runs more than 2 minutes over, gently interrupt and ask him to bring his feedback to a close, adding he can circulate further information by email after the meeting if necessary
Have a huge gong next to you that you strike fiercely when his time's up, preferably encouraging the other meeting delegates to join in a rousing countdown to help him along. "5... 4... 3... !"

Tardy Tamsin is a sweetie - but she's late to every meeting! What can you do to encourage her to improve her time-keeping?
Just wait for her - there's no point expecting her to turn up on time! She's late for everything
Stop the meeting when she eventually arrives, have everyone sit in frowning silence while she settles herself, and then continue without explaining to her what she's missed
Lock the door once the meeting has started, so she can't get in. That'll teach her

You're in mid-meeting, but there's a constant whispering going on between two of the participants. It's Chatty Cheryl and Nattering Nigel again. What do you do?
Stop the meeting and wait until they've finished - it's so annoying trying to speak over them!
Target one of the offenders, and ask in your best and firmest school-teacher voice, 'Sorry, Cheryl. Was there something you wanted to add?'
Stand up, slam your folder on the table, and bawl at the top of your voice, 'Will you two SHUT UP! We're trying to have a meeting here!'

Argumentative Adrian takes every opportunity to pick a fight with Bullish Brian - their long-standing rivalry means they're determined not to agree with each other, on principle. How do you stop them?
Well, they're both grown men. If they want to behave like children, let them! Makes for an entertaining meeting, with plenty of gossip to report back on the unofficial minutes afterwards!
Gently but firmly interrupt, ask each one to summarise their objection, decide whether it's relevant to your meeting, and if not, ask them to leave the matter for another time. Speak to both outside the meeting and explain the effect of their arguing. If they continue, don't invite them again
Supply them both with a pair of boxing gloves, clear the desks out of the way, and insist that they settle this thing here and now, like men

Timid Tony has vital information from his department, but rarely has the nerve to speak out. And when he does, Bullish Brian just interrupts him and bullies him back into silence. Is there anything you can do?
To be honest, Timid Tony just needs to get some assertiveness skills. He shouldn't be at the meeting if he can't open his mouth
Interrupting is not only rude, it means your meeting is dominated not by those with the best information but those with the loudest voices. Seat Timid Tony next to you at meetings, and protect him. Encourage his input, suggest he prepares written notes beforehand to help him, and insist that Bullish Brian waits until Timid Tony has finished. Make it a meeting rule - no interruptions
Construct a small desk-mounted catapult, and every time Bullish Brian starts to interrupt someone, fire an ink-laden pellet at him. Then run a book on how many ink stains he'll have on his shirt by the end of the meeting. (Winner gets to launch the catapult at the next meeting)

Your meetings are famous. But for the wrong reasons. They over-run by at least an hour every time. It just seems that so many other important issues come up in the meeting that you get side-tracked. What can you do?
It's not a problem. You like to think your meetings are an open forum, where any important matters can be discussed
Remember your agenda? Stick to it ruthlessly, and march forward. If other issues arise - important though they may be - schedule them for another meeting, and be determined to keep the meeting on track. Otherwise, you'll never reach a decision.
Rig up an electronic buzzer, with a large red button to activate it. Every time someone starts wandering from the agenda, press the buzzer and point at them, shouting, 'Off agenda! Not allowed!'

How did you score?

Mostly A: Goodness, your meetings must be chaos! People coming and going, late arrivals, chatter on the sidelines! You're so soft and woolly - do you bring any discipline to the gathering at all? You need to focus on your agenda, rein in badly-behaved delegates, and get a grip of your objectives, or you'll quickly find no-one wants to attend in future!

Mostly B: What a pleasure your meetings must be. Calm, organised, always running to time, usually reaching a group decision, and good-natured behaviour from your delegates! Full marks! Put on the top of your agenda, 'Pat yourself on the back for a job well done.' And don't be surprised if your stock rises in the company, as a result.

Mostly C: Your chairing skills are rather unorthodox - and probably illegal. But hey, it makes for an amusing diversion or two! Of course, some of the "C" options are tempting - wouldn't we all like to bellow at delegates who constantly start their own meeting in the corner! - but unfortunately, it's not good practice. It's a shame, but that's the corporate world. Chill out, exercise some restraint, and reserve your humorous antics for the bar. (Alternatively, see a shrink - fast!)


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