PA and Secretary Community - Deskdemon.com

Im leaving in a few weeks anyway so this isnt a personal thing or a current issue, athought my current relationship to my boss veers betwen love and hate on a daily, sometimes hourly basis ha!!

But I was wondering how many of you PA's out there have felt attracted to your boss?



Keep on truckin...

Never.  My current boss is a woman anyway.  I have worked with male bosses in the past and had excellent working relationships with them.  My approach to my work is fairly professional, and whilst I am friendly with all colleagues (and sometimes have developed true friendships with them), I am never familiar.  

I can appreciate a handsome man, but my feelings are well governed.  I would never entertain a romantic relationship with a colleague, and as for married men - I treat all married men with the same respect that I accord my parish priest.

The last boss I had who was male was some years older than me and I worked from his study in his home in London.  He treated me like a daughter, albeit a working daughter, which was very pleasant.  I have wonderful memories of that job.  

Never.  I have always firmly separated personal life from work life.

Never.....thankfully!

Never - best to keep business and personal separate.

However (tongue in cheek) if you worked for David Beckham it would make a change from filing I s'pose for 10 minutes ...........................!!?

Cathy,

Think of the overtime!!  I would be polishing his boots morning, noon and night!!

Sorry Gee - position filled!!! If it ever become vacant - highly unlikely - I will let you know.

Nice one!  

Never! It's important to keep it a very professional relationship, in fact one of my first goals when I started working for him was to develop a good relationship with his wife.

I'm a person who likes to hug people but I never hug anyone that I work with, from my boss to the team I work directly with.  Rumors can get started way too easily.

Never here as well.  Working relationships are just that, there are very few that I consider a friend outside of the office.  I try to maintain a professional relationship as well, but when you work in a small office as we do, we know each other so well.  We do joke around and tease each other in often, in a fun-loving manner, but if someone were to come in from the outside, they would think we we're very unappropriate and unprofessional.  We do have fun while we work, but we get done what is expected.

Diamondlady
Peer Moderator

Yes, but I didn't act on it.  Both of us are married.  I would nag him and joke I was his second wife.  The lines really didn't get blurred.  He was just a wonderful boss.  I even worked with his wife to "decorate" his office for his 40th birthday.  His wife and I became friends during my tenure.  I've stayed friends with him and he is a great reference for me.  He was really cute, Canadian with a french accent ,a swimmer, very well traveled, and dressed with an international flair.  He left the company six months after I did (after giving me a heads up on the direction the company was going - now that is the sign of a very good boss.)

The lines can be blurred sometimes between attraction and a healthy friendship,work relationship.  I like to think of it as a partnership.  Would never act on it.  I think it happens when you have a great relationship with someone you have to work this close with as a team.  We start and finish each others thoughts and sentences.  I have even picked up the phone to call him and he is already on the line calling me.  Spooky.  Just have to know what you are dealing with, a great working relationship,  and it may be attraction, but not one to act on.  Sometimes in our roles, we are referred to "work wives":)  Depending on the "work hubby", it's not so bad.

I have to say reading your postings, I have never had the kind of working relationship with any boss that you are all describing.

I always work professionally with my boss and his managers and whilst I do have a personality, I don't find it easy to joke around or get to know him personally.  I think also it depends on how any boss wants that relationship to be.  Most bosses I have had are quite private like me so I guess that suits us both.

You're quite right, Peaches.  PA relationships with their bosses are rather like a marriage and you go through some of the same ups and downs.  I think that a sense of humour is very important in the workplace as it smooths a lot of rough bits and lightens those occasional tense moments that arise from time to time even in the best regulated companies, and makes people comfortable to be with.

It takes a good while for the relationship to be established: ways of working, likes, dislikes, temperaments etc.  Any accommodation to be made is generally more on the side of the PA, but the boss has to get used to the PA as well!  Once you have got past that stage, then it becomes a real partnership.  If the PA's strengths and weaknesses complement those of her boss, if both are competent professionals and there is trust between them, then that is a recipe for a real partnership.

Rain, exactly how I feel.  Building the partnership and getting through the early months of establishing the partnership are the toughest.  After that, once you are working in sync, it's a cake walk.  Humor does play a key part.  Don't take yourself too seriously and Don't sweat the small stuff.  

I've never been attracted to a colleague in any way that could cause difficulties or awkwardness.  In the past, most of my bosses have been female (often a whole other set of problems with female bosses!) so it hasn't been an issue anyway, but as I'm in a relationship I'd never let it be an issue.  There have been colleagues who I can't help but notice are good-looking (I'm human), but nothing more than that.  As there are a lot of younger people in my office, in my age range, and also more men than in most of my previous jobs, I suppose it's inevitable that some would be quite easy on the eye!  But even if I was single, I personally think that relationships in the office (particularly with a superior) are a recipe for disaster.

Yes and no. When I started my new job I was attracted to my boss but now three years on knowing him as well as I do, not any more. Now we get on really well and we do meet up with drinks with our relevant partners at Xmas and birthdays. I babysit for his kids, he drives past my parents to get to and from work and will drop stuff off for me/pick stuff up to save me the 60+ drive to their house (and £5.30 bridge toll). Him and my hubbie go to footie together occassionally.
I now get people in work admitting that they have a crush on him and it's really surprising the number of females that do. One told me that she can't sit by him when he's in her office as his voice makes her go all funny!
He applied for another job at the same level closer to his home which was a new post and he got to second interview and had actually asked me if I would go with him to the new job!
His partner regularly jokes that he has two thumb prints on his forehead, one is hers and one is mine.

If you have a great working relationship with someone, and they ask you to go with them to a new assignment, I say go.  I did and have really enjoyed the challenge of learning a different side of the business. It takes time to build that kind of relationship and it is worth keeping.