Title: how should I take this
Post by: rowan on December 09, 2005, 09:29:43 pm
Ok I am a little up set right now. This is my second time requesting to go to a supervisory training course. My boss just told me that he got a call from HR and that the class is full, he had to send two of his other supervisors and that there is over 20 people attending. It is for supervisors and folks that may want to be supervisor. Of course I was upset and said, so When will I be able to go, he joked and said before you retire, that these other people had to go and I said I understand. This was a very quick conversation in the hall. But I am PO there have been people who have went and they did not supervise and one has already taken a new job with another department.
I don't know what to make of this I like my job and boss but feel like he does not think it is important for me to attend. Should I look for another job or just wait it out?
I don't know what to make of this I like my job and boss but feel like he does not think it is important for me to attend. Should I look for another job or just wait it out?
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: whitesatin on December 10, 2005, 12:36:23 am
I think you need to be absolutely frank with your boss and tell him exactly what you told us. It may straighten things out and make you feel better. If nothing else, if he is honest, you will know for sure where you stand and can make a decision from there.
WhiteSatin 
WhiteSatin Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: gee4 on December 12, 2005, 10:35:20 am
I think you have been given the right advice here - be honest with your boss and say how you feel. If it goes nowhere, you know where you stand. It might be worth looking elsewhere but don't do anything rash.
G
G
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: raindance on December 12, 2005, 10:52:23 am
A good strategy is to communicate verbally to your boss how your feel (leaving aside any displays of emotion, if at all possible, but you can SAY you feel disappointed, disenfranchised etc). Then follow it up with a memo - as long as you don't talk yourself out of a job - saying that you found your discussion unsatisfactory because or that you found it helpful and would like to take it forward ... If you don't put things in writing, then your remarks can be dismissed.
Raindance
Raindance
Title: Re: how should I take this *DELETED*
Post by: raindance on December 12, 2005, 10:52:24 am
Post deleted by
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: raindance on December 12, 2005, 11:11:19 am
Oh ... I'm in here twice ... how exciting. 
R.
R.
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: Jackie G on December 12, 2005, 02:25:51 pm
Rain
I took out your duplicate posting!
Jackie, Peer Moderator
www.iqps.org
I took out your duplicate posting!
Jackie, Peer Moderator
www.iqps.org
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: countrigal on December 12, 2005, 04:29:15 pm
Definitely talk to your boss about this. It may be that HR is giving him a list of his folks that HAVE to go to the training (perhaps they need refresher training, or it has been identified as an area they need training in because of performance issues) and he is putting your name forward but they are dropping it because of some of these "have-to's" and perhaps he is also feeling like "when will she be going" and that was the reason for his comment about "before you retire". But you'll never know unless you talk to him and let him know how you're feeling, and perhaps even if he knows why you've not been added to the list yet.
CountriGal
Peer Moderator
CountriGal
Peer Moderator
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: rowan on December 12, 2005, 08:17:31 pm
Thanks for all the sugestions, I was going to talk to him today but he has been in meetings all day, should I try and squeeze it in or wait for another day when he is less stressed? He will be out of the office all day tomorrow and all morning the next day.
Should I wait and bring it up another time? does it matter when I bring it up. Another note I am sure he has some input in me going so I do not think he is pushing for me to attend.
Should I wait and bring it up another time? does it matter when I bring it up. Another note I am sure he has some input in me going so I do not think he is pushing for me to attend.
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: raindance on December 13, 2005, 10:10:54 am
Bide your time for today and tomorrow, Rowan, but do approach him as soon as possible after that and say you would like to speak with him about something and would like ten minutes of his time. That shouldn't be too difficult for him, even if he is busy with other meetings.
Raindance
Raindance
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: msmarieh on December 13, 2005, 09:37:40 pm
Wait and think through how you want to raise the subject...
If it were me, the conversation would go something like this:
Bossie, I was very disappointed to hear that I had been turned down a second time for the supervisor training I was scheduled to take. As you know, I am very interested in growing with XYZ company and I believe that a key factor in my longterm success with this company is receiving proper training. Obviously managers receive first priority and I accept that. However, I am struggling to understand how priorities are determined for non-manager attendees. Can you give me some insight into the rationale behind who is chosen for attendance?
Depending on bossie's answers, my response would vary...
If it is clear that bossie would not support my training, is this a deal breaker for me? Would it be sufficient to cause me to look elsewhere? If so, then you have your answer (not that I would tell bossie that of course).
If bossie wavers, this is the opportunity to press the issue and reiterate why it is so important to you. Ask him to voice his concerns so that you can address them.
If bossie promises to put you through next time, follow up with an email confirmation of that statement (Bossie, just to confirm our conversation today, you have indicated that I will be allowed to go to the next supervisor's training. I will advise HR of this approval. Thank you!)
Marie
If it were me, the conversation would go something like this:
Bossie, I was very disappointed to hear that I had been turned down a second time for the supervisor training I was scheduled to take. As you know, I am very interested in growing with XYZ company and I believe that a key factor in my longterm success with this company is receiving proper training. Obviously managers receive first priority and I accept that. However, I am struggling to understand how priorities are determined for non-manager attendees. Can you give me some insight into the rationale behind who is chosen for attendance?
Depending on bossie's answers, my response would vary...
If it is clear that bossie would not support my training, is this a deal breaker for me? Would it be sufficient to cause me to look elsewhere? If so, then you have your answer (not that I would tell bossie that of course).
If bossie wavers, this is the opportunity to press the issue and reiterate why it is so important to you. Ask him to voice his concerns so that you can address them.
If bossie promises to put you through next time, follow up with an email confirmation of that statement (Bossie, just to confirm our conversation today, you have indicated that I will be allowed to go to the next supervisor's training. I will advise HR of this approval. Thank you!)
Marie
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: misslynn on December 14, 2005, 06:33:17 am
^^^ That is perfect.
Take a logical approach to it, I know it's emotional for you but don't take an emotional approach to the conversation. Let him know how important it is to you and your growth as a person and with the company.
Good luck and let us know how it goes!
Take a logical approach to it, I know it's emotional for you but don't take an emotional approach to the conversation. Let him know how important it is to you and your growth as a person and with the company.
Good luck and let us know how it goes!
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: rowan on December 14, 2005, 09:21:17 pm
Thanks Marie, this has been the week from he-- no time to talk to him today he has been on the road all day. He just got back and is dealing with internal problems, I leave in half an hour. I hope tomorrow he will have time. I was strugling on how to say it but your words are great thanks so much. I will let you know what happens. Its not that I want to supervise now but this course would be helpful when/ if something comes open.
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: rowan on December 27, 2005, 02:13:23 pm
Ok, I knew with the holiday and all his meetings I would not get to talk to him, so I sent him an email last week on Dec. 19. Pretty much asking him in the insightful manner you sugested. Well he chose not to reply, he has his e-mail set up where you can preview it and not open it. That would be all he needed to view the question. So how do I take it that he chose not to reply, he has done this before to me and I confronted him. I do not think that is a good thing to do right now he has been uptight. Should I just keep my eyes open for other posting of a job, I work for the State Government so we post jobs and would need him for a reference, plus politics being what they are it gets around wether your a good Administrative Assistant or not, and I am trying to Break Out of the clerical role and move up since I have gotten my degree, without a lot of success. I could use some advice. Thanks
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: msmarieh on December 27, 2005, 07:17:10 pm
If it were me, on December 29, I would re-send the email with a 2nd request in the subject line and a paragraph added at the beginning:
Bossie,
I know you have been crazy busy with work this past two weeks, but I didn't want to let this important issue slip through the cracks. Please advise.
If he doesn't get back to me within a day or two, I would then schedule an appointment on his calendar, print out the email, walk in to the appointment with it and have him address the subject on the spot.
It is not uncommon for me to schedule an appointment for myself on my boss's calendar if there is something I absolutely want to discuss with him.
HOWEVER, you had better be emotionally prepared for the news of him saying, you know what, I just don't support this and I can't put through your name. Usually when bosses avoid a subject it is because they are going to turn you down and they don't want to tell you. (not always of course, sometimes they really are just too busy...) If that is the case, you want to be cool, calm and collected in your response and make sure you don't inadvertently get emotional and burn some bridges you didn't mean to burn.
Marie
Bossie,
I know you have been crazy busy with work this past two weeks, but I didn't want to let this important issue slip through the cracks. Please advise.
If he doesn't get back to me within a day or two, I would then schedule an appointment on his calendar, print out the email, walk in to the appointment with it and have him address the subject on the spot.
It is not uncommon for me to schedule an appointment for myself on my boss's calendar if there is something I absolutely want to discuss with him.
HOWEVER, you had better be emotionally prepared for the news of him saying, you know what, I just don't support this and I can't put through your name. Usually when bosses avoid a subject it is because they are going to turn you down and they don't want to tell you. (not always of course, sometimes they really are just too busy...) If that is the case, you want to be cool, calm and collected in your response and make sure you don't inadvertently get emotional and burn some bridges you didn't mean to burn.
Marie
Title: Re: how should I take this
Post by: countrigal on December 28, 2005, 03:50:30 pm
And if/when you do go to speak to him... like MsMarieh said, be prepared for a negative response. But also be prepared with some questions for him regarding that. If he says he can't support you in this endeavor, ask him why? Is there something more you could do to prove yourself for this opportunity? Does he see an area you need to improve in your current position prior to moving into this educational opportunity? And would it be possible that sometime in the future he would be more willing to support you in this? What would it take to make that possible?
This way you might be able to learn if there are other issues going on here, perhaps even performance-based issues, that are on his mind that he is not sharing with you. Will give you a way to improve yourself. If none of this is true... and you still don't get support... then I'd definitely be looking elsewhere for a position and boss that will support your career growth.
CountriGal
Peer Moderator
This way you might be able to learn if there are other issues going on here, perhaps even performance-based issues, that are on his mind that he is not sharing with you. Will give you a way to improve yourself. If none of this is true... and you still don't get support... then I'd definitely be looking elsewhere for a position and boss that will support your career growth.
CountriGal
Peer Moderator