Print Page - 35 OBSERVATIONS

1: Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.

2: He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

3: A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

4: Change is inevitable except from a vending machine.

5: Back up my hard drive? How do you put it in reverse?

6:I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

7: When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

8: Seen it all, done it all. Can't remember most of it.

9: Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

10: I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

11: He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged.

12: She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the June flower.

13: You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted then used against you.

14: I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.

15: Honk if you love peace and quiet.

16: Pardon my driving, I'm reloading.

17: Despite the cost of living, have you noticed that it remains popular.

18: Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

19: It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial costs and blamed it on the high cost of living.

20 Just remember..... if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

21 The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

22: It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to

end, some would be stupid enough to try and pass them.

23: You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

24: Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world population.

25: If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

26: The things that come to those who wait are left there by the ones who got there first.

27: LBJ Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

28: Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

29: Shin: A device for finding furniture.

30: A fine is a Tax for doing wrong. A tax is a Fine for doing

well.

31: It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats.

32: Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since no one listens.

33: I wish the buck stopped here, I could use a few.

34: I started out with nothing and I still have most of it.

35: When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people who were not smart enough to get out of jury duty.

PA and Secretary Community - Deskdemon.com

General Discussion => The Humour Zone => Topic started by: radaro on August 29, 2001, 08:55:26 am